I went to the Super Market near my house yesterday. Like everybody, I checked if I was carrying the usual list of essentials. Without these, you cannot survive in the outside world. Walk out of the apartment gate and you'll always notice that you've missed something. In your left pocket, you should have a huge rectangular object weighing down your entire pant, yes, this bulk is capable of tilting one side of your pant if you haven't properly tied the rope in your pants ("Naada" - if you haven't got it yet). Some may say that there are no ropes in jeans, well, You are not normal if you're wearing Jeans to the Supermarket. I'm not struggling to pull up tight jeans only to go and stand in line with people staring at veggies. So, in conclusion, I always wear tracks and my huge phone weighs down my left pocket. To avoid any embarrassing moments (in case of Naada-less pants), I hold my phone in my hand and like all other millennials, walk on the road staring at my phone. One time, I was very close to stamping an old man's mask shop. He had neatly laid all his masks on the floor over a mat and me, being the phone-addict didn't notice him. Thankfully, I suddenly looked up and averted a muddy catastrophe on his colorful masks.
The next thing you need is money. Stores aren't gonna just hand out stuff. There are two ways to handle your finances: 1) A Wallet (Preferred without holes) or 2) Violently shoving the money in your pocket (Also without holes). I prefer the first option but always end up taking the second option. Why? because I'm lazy to fold and put all my money neatly in my wallet and wallets occupy a lot of pocket space. So, I often end up with 10 and 20 rupee origami in my pockets. The second option also allows you to experience happiness when you find a very old but very clean 10 rupee note from pants you washed. All joy aside, there is still one major disadvantage in shoving money in your pants, you will have to take out the origami buried deep under your phone while a bunch of impatient, middle-aged people wait behind you with two heavy baskets filled with groceries. There are times when I took out the money vigorously and my phone's screen would've needed an obituary in the newspaper.
A list and a bag are essential. This list is always written on a very old paper that is mysteriously torn from one of your old school notes. This paper is never neat and it's shape will remind you of your first attempts at making Dosa. This paper often suffers the same fate as the money, i.e, Origami. It also annoyingly gets mixed up with your money. You could ask me, "Why not use your phone to take the list?" Well, I don't want to go and collide into the Biscuit section and see Good day become Bad day.
An old cloth bag is a part of every house-hold. This cloth bag is taken everywhere - from the Bank to the Ration shop. Sniff it and you'll most probably get a scent of rice. This bag will be your companion as you roam in the numerous sections of the Supermarket. Finally, after your shopping is done and you reach the counter, the billing person will toss your prized possession on the counter. Now you have to follow an order to fill your bag at the market to avoid a wet mess: 1) Put un-squishable articles like biscuit packets and chapati flour at the bottom. 2) Put un-squishable veggies on top of that 3) Put squishable veggies and stuff like curd packets and eggs on the top. Change this order and you will walk happily with a leaky bag.
A new normal has emerged in the last three months. An article has become the most essential. You cannot venture outside your door or you'll hear your parents yelling. You need to protect your body from germs. You need masks now. Masks that keep you protected from the Corona Virus. People wear different set of masks in different ways and that is a whole topic for another time.
Sometimes, it so happens that you get fully equipped for all your Supermarket expeditions and as you step outside your door, you feel the cold tiles of your apartment, Yes, you forgot to wear your slippers. You can't walk on our world class roads without the best set for protection. You might slip on the freshest cow dung out there, so watch out.
P.S: Bike keys? No, I don't want to waste petrol to go to a market that's 5 minutes away. (Also, I have very long legs, so make it 3 minutes)
Comments